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lizakova is shinying up her life.
Kitty Guardian
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 1303
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 Posted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 11:42 pm Post subject: Passover Joke |
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The fact that I laughed at this is proof beyond all doubt that I am a true Jew.
| Quote: | Bernie, a young Jewish boy, decided he wanted to be an aeronautical engineer and build airplanes. Over the years he studied hard, went to MIT, and finally got his degree. It didn't take long before he gained a reputation as the finest aeronautical engineer in all the land, so he decided to start his own company to build jets.
His company was such a hit that the President of the United States called Bernie into his office. "Bernie," the president said, "the President of Israel wants to commission your company to build an advanced jet fighter for his country. You have our approval - go out and design him the best jet fighter ever made."
Needless to say, Bernie was tremendously excited at this prospect. The entire resources of his company went into building the most advanced jet fighter in history. Everything looked terrific on paper, but when they held the first test flight of the new jet, disaster struck. The wings couldn't take the strain - they broke clean off of the fuselage! (The test pilot parachuted to safety, thank G-d.)
Bernie was devastated; his company redesigned the jet fighter, but the same thing happened at the next test flight - the wings broke off again.
Beside himself with worry, Bernie went to his Shul ("synagogue" in Yiddish) to pray...to ask G-d where he had gone wrong. The rabbi saw Bernie's sadness, and naturally asked him what the matter was. Bernie decided to pour his heart out to the rabbi.
After hearing the problem with the jet fighter, the rabbi put his arm on Bernie's shoulder and told him, "Listen, I know how to solve your problem. All you have to do is drill a row of holes directly above and below where the wing meets the fuselage. If you do this, I absolutely guarantee the wings won't fall off."
Bernie just smiled and thanked the rabbi for his advice, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized he had nothing to lose. Maybe the rabbi had some holy insight.
So Bernie did exactly what the rabbi told him to do. On the next design of the jet fighter, they drilled a row of holes directly above and below where the wings met the fuselage. And...it worked!! The next test flight went perfectly!
Brimming with joy, Bernie went to the Shul to tell the rabbi that his advice had worked. "Naturally," said the rabbi, "I never doubted it would." "But Rabbi, how did you know that drilling the holes would prevent the wings from falling off?"
"Bernie," the rabbi intoned, "I'm an old man. I've lived for many, many years and I've celebrated Passover many, many times. And in all those years, not once - NOT ONCE - has the matzoh broken on the perforation!" |
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mchicken is dejected.
Cover of Rush's Seminal Album
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 3835
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| Posted: Tue Apr 22, 2008 11:58 pm Post subject: |
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| I understand what 99% of the words in that mean but I don't get it. |
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lizakova is shinying up her life.
Kitty Guardian
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 1303
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:02 am Post subject: |
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| mchicken wrote: | | I understand what 99% of the words in that mean but I don't get it. |
Proof that you're just not Jewish enough. |
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jaster is back in black
Mod Emperor of Dune
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 3084
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:04 am Post subject: |
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wut?
_________________
When I am weaker than you, I ask you for freedom because that is according to your principles; when I am stronger than you, I take away your freedom because that is according to my principles.
-Children of Dune, attributed to Louis Veuillot |
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mchicken is dejected.
Cover of Rush's Seminal Album
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 3835
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:05 am Post subject: |
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| lizakova wrote: | | mchicken wrote: | | I understand what 99% of the words in that mean but I don't get it. |
Proof that you're just not Jewish enough. |
Am I supposed to be? |
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estick is Eraser-mad.
Very Jewish
Joined: 13 Sep 2007
Posts: 194
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:08 am Post subject: |
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| That was hilarious. |
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epb
Mendicant
Joined: 15 Dec 2007
Posts: 451
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:46 am Post subject: |
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| Definitely funny. |
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mchicken is dejected.
Cover of Rush's Seminal Album
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 3835
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:49 am Post subject: |
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| WHAT IS GOING ON |
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lizakova is shinying up her life.
Kitty Guardian
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 1303
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:53 am Post subject: |
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| mchicken wrote: | | WHAT IS GOING ON |
It's funny, because were you to convert to Judaism, you would instantly understand that joke and find it hilarious. |
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mchicken is dejected.
Cover of Rush's Seminal Album
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 3835
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:58 am Post subject: |
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| What if I fake convert like Eli? |
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hankr is 100% sold to a law firm for the low starting price of $160k/year, his soul, and his free time
annex ghost
Joined: 26 Sep 2007
Posts: 574
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| Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 1:07 pm Post subject: |
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| So, after wiki'ing some terms, I get it. I just don't find it funny at all. |
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rehughes is hustlin'
The Guy You Meet on the Internet
Joined: 14 Sep 2007
Posts: 87
Location: United States
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| Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 7:41 pm Post subject: |
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| See, even I got that. |
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mchicken is dejected.
Cover of Rush's Seminal Album
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 3835
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| Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 7:49 pm Post subject: |
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| rehughes wrote: | | See, even I got that. |
I don't believe that for even half a second. |
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epb
Mendicant
Joined: 15 Dec 2007
Posts: 451
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| Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 8:49 pm Post subject: |
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Look, it's funny primarily because it's true.
See?
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mchicken is dejected.
Cover of Rush's Seminal Album
Joined: 11 Sep 2007
Posts: 3835
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| Posted: Thu Apr 24, 2008 8:56 pm Post subject: |
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| What? |
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